So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
