i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
