there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
