ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
that's an acceptable place to lick
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
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