that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize