Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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