Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
