When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize