Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
zippers are such a cool invention
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize