i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize