her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
