Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
