But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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