he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize