I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize