Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
