then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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