The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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