a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
