If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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