Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
