He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
