thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize