to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
