she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
accomplished twins. life is a go
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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