Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Maybe he injected his testicle?
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
