Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
