Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
porn star boner night. come get it.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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