when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
i think my cat just said my name.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
