Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
