shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
