But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize
