I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
