I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Who died my cat blue again?
Randomize
