I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
