That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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