scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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