It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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