i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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