Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Randomize
