When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
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