i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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