So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
