In the future we'll all be gay
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Never joke about your clitoris.
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