Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize