Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize