i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
