we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
