Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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