It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
