Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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