Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize