So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Randomize